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Writer's pictureCatherine Hulme

Family First - September 2024

Welcome back after your summer break! We hope you filled it with whatever brings you health and happiness.

This transition from summer freedom to term-term pressure provides a rare opportunity to set some intentions for the coming year. Before we fully submerge ourselves in the plethora of work demands, let's take a moment to reflect on how our professional and personal responsibilities coexist, specifically family responsibilities. 


What are your non-negotiables when it comes to family time? What desires do you have for nurturing these relationships, even amidst your busy schedules?




For this reflection, let's broaden our definition of ‘Family’ as we know it means different things to different people: let’s take it to mean whoever provides a sense of "home," where we are celebrated, nurtured, and safe; where there are shared values and deep responsibilities. This might be the people we live with, or it could be close friends who fill our life with love and support.


As you step into this new school year, keep these people in mind as you carve out your working patterns and expectations. Where, and to what extent, does time with your family feature?


Rather than aiming for the elusive "work/life balance," consider adopting a mindset of "whole life balance." This nuanced difference in perspective encourages us to see our lives as an integrated whole, where work and family are not in competition, but rather, complement each other.


Let's face it, family dynamics can be complicated, often affecting our emotional resilience and intellectual focus. It can be a powerful realisation that addressing concerns at home can significantly enhance your effectiveness at work. Likewise, if your working day becomes less emotionally draining, your presence with family will be much fuller.

As we reflect on our own family intentions, it's also crucial to consider those of our colleagues. A simple question like, "How's the family?" can go a long way in showing that you care about their wellbeing beyond just their professional performance; demonstrating empathy of others' family needs can foster a more supportive workplace culture.

I'm reminded of a chapter in All That We Are in which a group of business colleagues experience a shift from their effective and close teamwork, to a sense of separation and friction. Their coach asks:

“I wonder if you’ve allowed for the way you’ve each developed over the years. How your lives, priorities and dreams have changed…"


With the conversation opened, they learn that Seb’s mum has developed dementia, Emilia’s dad is in hospital with acute anxiety and Ben is so uncomfortable with the atmosphere that he is reconsidering his whole life balance. They are all experiencing significant external pressures, and had not found a way to communicate their needs. As you may expect from a chapter entitled, “Love Refound”, they came to agreements, through facilitation: Emilia and Seb could take time to see and support their parents and Ben could reduce his hours. To do this, they would delegate more management responsibilities.


We know flexibility in schools can be limited. Yet, in the current recruitment and retention crisis, it's more important than ever to make school demands and commitments fit around home and family needs. Recent reports highlight the alarming attrition of women in their 30s from the teaching profession. The New Britain Project and the MTPT Project published six key recommendations over the summer aimed at stemming the tide of "Missing Mothers" —women leaving the profession due to the pressures of balancing work and family life.


PURE coaching can help individuals to create an effective whole life balance. The ‘P’ of PURE stands for Personal – whatever topic you choose to explore, consideration will be given to how you will be affected personally by any actions you decide to take.

"Professionally, [the coaching] is starting to enable me to do my job more effectively at work, but also to have a better home life balance, since feeling satisfied and empowered at work, is enabling me to be more present with my family and able to better enjoy the time off I have with them. Generally feeling better about myself as a leader, colleague and mum, has resulted in me being more motivated about my work.” – Jennie Kingston, Assistant Headteacher, Highgate Wood School

As we start this new school year, let's commit to creating a workplace culture that values and supports the family lives of all colleagues, including our own. By fostering an environment of empathy, understanding, and flexibility, we can help ensure that our schools are not just places of learning but also places where staff feel valued and supported in all aspects of their lives.


  • What would a balanced life look like for you, realistically, this academic year?

  • What commitments can you put in place today, to ensure your personal life gets the attention it needs? How can you communicate this to the relevant colleagues and relations?

  • How can you create/maintain communication channels with colleagues about their personal needs?


Best of luck for a smooth transition back to term-time; remember to pay attention to yourself, and to your families, both personal and professional.


Very best wishes,




Director

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